Those of you who have been reading for a while may remember that during the baseball playoffs I hung my Angels cap from our canopy bedpost. Empirical evidence suggests that it helped my Angels win the World Series.
So, when Katy started exhibiting concern that something she had ordered for me would not be delivered in time for Christmas, I suggested hanging a Santa hat from the same bedpost.
Yesterday, the item in question arrived, almost a week before delivery had been promised.
I must resist the temptation to use this mighty talisman for evil purposes.
Last night Katy and I spent a few hours wrapping presents for the kids. (This will undoubtedly make Christmas Eve a little more relaxing.) While we were wrapping we decided to watch a couple Christmas specials. Inbetween all the taping and cutting, I got to thinking about the way Santa is portrayed in the "Big Three" Rankin-Bass Christmas specials - Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer, Santa Claus is Comin' to Town, and The Year Without A Santa Claus.
Rudolph:
I didn't realize that Santa was a bigot. However, he dismisses Rudolph in spite of the excellent performance the young buck puts on in the Reindeer Games - just because of his nose. He doesn't really change his tune until it's clear that he needs Rudolph. Santa is also a major crab in this one, dismissing the elves' new song with a wave of his hand and leaving Mrs. Claus to pick up the shattered pieces of the choirmaster's ego.
Santa Claus is Comin' to Town:
This one isn't quite so bad on the face of it. Santa just wants to get toys to the kids. However, did you notice that when he decides to cut back to one trip a year, he picks his anniversary night? Nice. And while we're discussing marital non-bliss, don't you find it interesting that Jessica doesn't speak a single word (and puts on a considerable amount of weight) after they get married? Is Jessica trapped in a loveless marriage, with Christmas cookies her only comfort? Sure looks that way.
The Year Without A Santa Claus:
Santa wants a year off from delivering presents in this one. Are you kidding me? The elves make the toys, and all he has to do is deliver them - he only works one day a year! Mrs. Claus, ever the supportive spouse, moves heaven and earth to get the big baby his day off and what does he do? He decides to work anyway. Ingrate.
(Yeah, things are a little slow at work this afternoon.)
Yes, I know I should be working. Today at lunch we had our third annual "department holiday potluck and gift exchange." We use fairly standard rules of engagement for the gift exchange - you draw a number and people pick presents in order. When it's your turn you can either take from the pile or take an already opened gift from somebody else, who then has to pick a new gift from the pile.
The strange thing about this year's exchange was that I got something that I actually wanted! I mean, I'm going to have to go remove it from my Amazon wishlist. Considering that some of the gifts were blank CD-Rs, M&M dispensers, and a SpongeBob SquarePants toilet seat cover, I consider this a minor miracle.
Some of you may be surprised that I led in with that little tale when the big news is last night's midnight screening of The Lord of The Rings - The Two Towers. Woot!
It's quite good. I think it suffers a bit from "middle movie syndrome" - neither a beginning or an ending - but that's a small complaint. As it is a trivial exercise to find information about The Two Towers on the web I won't delve into a lot of details, but here are some of my observations (Insert obligatory spoilers warning here):
1. In one scene, Legolas mounts a galloping horse in a manner that is "I can't believe I just saw that" cool. The audience burst into applause.
2. I was skeptical about the "Gollum for Best Supporting Actor" campaign I've been hearing about, but now that I've seen it, I understand. The character may be CG, but it's really well done. Gollum was far and away the best-developed new character of the movie.
3. Don't mess with the forest. The "When Trees Attack" scene with the Ents is very cool.
4. "Dwarf = comic relief" got to be a bit much for me.
5. Elves in Helm's Deep? Really? Ok, ok, I'll play along.
I think I'll quit there, lest my Tolkien Purist tendencies make me seem curmudgeonly.
Saturday I took the kids on an adventure. We went and harvested some fresh mistletoe to decorate the house.
There's quite a bit of the stuff growing around here, but most of it is pretty high up in the trees. A few years back I noticed a spot with some growing a little lower in the trees, and I've been going there to harvest Christmas mistletoe ever since. Anyway, I bundled up the kids and we got out of Katy's hair and into the fresh air for a good hour or so.
We had a good time and I took advantage of the opportunity to explain parasites - "Kids, mistletoe is a parasite - just like tapeworms, ticks, and your Uncle Doug."
This year we managed to get some with berries, which was a bonus as far as I was concerned. I tied up a nice big cluster for the doorway between our family room and living room, and each of the kids has a smaller cluster hanging in their rooms. Even with that, I still have most of a garbage bag full of the stuff, so if any of my four L.A. area readers would like some, let me know.
In other news, Friday night I bottled my recent batch of beer - it seems to be turning out okay. In keeping with the spirit of this batch, I was up until about one in the morning dealing with it. The beer isn't as dark as my last batch of stout - likely due to my sparging problems - but it was smooth and tasty. In a couple weeks it should be carbonated and good to go. We'll see.
Due to the workspace requirements of ongoing redecoration projects in Claire and Cameron's room, I've had to park on the street for the last week or so. (I suppose I could park in the driveway - but then my car would be dripping oil on said driveway, instead of in the street. I don't feel as compelled to clean up the street.)
This morning my car had (are you sitting down?) ice on the windows. Yes, ice!
It was already starting to soften a bit, and I was able to scrape it off with a squeegee - but I did clump up enough to make a small "snowball." As my aim is exceptional, I hit the trunk of our street tree on the first try.
My friend Dean has joined the ranks of webloggers. You can read his addled rantings here.
Well, I was going to write up a story about my weekend spent lighting our Christmas tree. Nobody ever believes me when I tell them how many lights are on the tree, so I thought I'd take some pictures along the way and share the experience.
Sadly, I am a poor photographer. I thought the pictures would look better if I turned the flash off and let the tree lights provide for the exposure. The pictures are nicely lit - unfortunately they are also quite blurry, thanks to my inability to hold the camera still.
Without the pictures the topic loses what little appeal it had to start with, so I will just summarize. We have a 7 foot tree this year - give or take a couple inches. I put 18 strings of 100 lights on the tree. I started putting the lights on at around 10 AM Saturday, and worked until 5:30 PM, at which point I had completed 15 strings of lights. I began anew Sunday morning about 10:30 AM and worked until noon. I averaged about 30 minutes a string, which isn't bad considering Bloody Mary breaks, lunch breaks, "playing Hot Wheels with Cameron" breaks, and the like.
How do you get that many lights on a tree? Simple. Pick a branch. Starting at the trunk, wrap the branch out to the tip. Then wrap back to the trunk. Go to the next branch. Repeat. Do I really wrap every branch? Pretty much - I do tend to cheat a little bit at the bottom in the back, but you can't really see that part anyway. I also recommend an adult beverage every three strings or so.
In other news, my fantasy football team was eliminated from my league's playoffs tonight. I had a pretty good season this year, coming in second in my division - but now that I'm out of it, I won't pay much attention to the NFL until the Super Bowl - and even that's just an excuse to eat salty snacks and drink beers. When does spring training start again?
Katy took the kids to see Santa on Friday. Here are the pictures:
Incredibly cute kids aside, isn't that a great mall Santa?
Last night we went out with some friends. Our plans included Chinese food for dinner, followed by visits to a couple local bars.
The first place we went after dinner was the Rendezvous Lounge in old Newhall. I had only heard stories about this place from my friend Henry, who had his bachelor party there a few years back. (Unlike Henry, I managed to make it out of the place still in the possession of both my wallet and my underwear.) According to the bartender, there has been a bar on the property there since the 1840's. Cool.
It's funny how the old habits come back to you - holding the longneck beer bottle with the "pen grip," getting your back to the wall so you can check out the scene, and keeping your elbow tucked in when you drink your beer to avoid collisions in a tight space. A good time was had by all.
Winston Churchill once said that British naval tradition amounted to "rum, sodomy, and the lash." I have no way of knowing whether he was right or wrong, but traditions are a funny thing.
At the Flying W household, it has become traditional to get our Christmas tree on a Friday evening in early December. The preferred venue for this activity is the local Home Depot. They have the noble firs that Katy and I both prefer, their prices are excellent, and we've always gotten nice fresh trees there.
I bring my work gloves and a utility knife - if I remember. (This year I did not.) Wading back into the stacks of six to seven foot noble firs, I look for a promising tree top. When I find one, I haul it out to the aisle and unwrap it so Katy can appraise it. Once we find a good one, we set it aside and look for a better one.
We mentioned to a couple neighbors that we got our tree at Home Depot. The looks ranged from amusement to absolute horror. Apparently this tradition places us firmly in the camp of the Tree Philistines - Real Families go and cut their own trees down. But here's the thing - if you go to cut your tree down around here, it's a tree that was planted for that purpose - in nice neat little rows, as likely as not on a Southern California Edison power line easement. It's just as artificial an environment for those trees as the parking lot of a home improvement center.
Anyway, it took me all day Saturday and part of Sunday to get the lights on the tree. Sometime this week I'll post the whole story of that particular odyssey.
I work in a mid-rise building. There is a parking garage attached for all us salary drones to park in. Since this is LA, I drive by myself to work each day and park there.
This morning, there was quite the backup to get in. Everybody got to wait a few minutes.
I watched a young lady (I will be polite here and give her the benefit of the doubt) who had been waiting for a bit pull up to the entry driveway. As she approached the gate, she suddenly realized that she needed her parking card. Oh! What a surprise!
It took her another minute of rooting around in her car to find the thing. Then - wait, you'll like this part - she had to roll down the window. And put the card in the little slot! This is all so new! What will they think of next?
In the meantime, the entire block was gridlocked - people trying to get into the garage, people trying to pull into traffic from curbside, people who had the misfortune of turning down that particular block at that particular moment, and the normal smattering of clueless pedestrians, who I will complain about some other time.
Yes, I know that it probably only added a minute or two to my nearly-an-hour commute. But she still should have had her card ready. At least.
Heard something interesting on NPR the other night. Seems Radio Shack is discontinuing it's policy of requesting name, address, and telephone number from every customer.
This is a welcome change.
Every time I went in to Radio Shack I would have this conversation with the clerk.
Clerk: "May I have your name and address?"
Me: "No."
Clerk: "But we'd like to add you to our mailing list."
Me: "I'm already on it."
Clerk: "But I need it to complete this transaction."
Me: "I'm paying cash. You do not need all that information."
Clerk: Sputter sputter sputter...
Me: "Are you selling me this stuff or am I leaving?"
Clerk: Grumble grumble grumble...
Come to think of it, I'll probably miss giving the Radio Shack guys a hard time.
I got ahead of myself. Claire and Cameron spent all night Friday throwing up. I was feeling crummy too but managed to avoid the throwing up part.
Cameron has quite good aim. He hit his bedside bowl every single time.